Spooty and Soju

2011-08-01T20:25:00.002-05:00

I wish I could understand my thoughts all the time. Occasionally they make no sense to me, my thoughts and my feelings just befuddle me sometimes and it is rather frustrating. A cure for it all you ask? A nice brisk walk, followed by a shower, a cup o' chamomile tea and the blues . . .perhaps it will help. Funny that the first song that comes on is "Crazy woman" . . . how fitting .

2011-04-30T18:55:00.002-05:00

We are again in the throws of change. It never ends for us it seems and sometimes I wonder if he wonders if it is worth it. I asked him finally the other day, prefacing it with it is to me, I just want to be fair, because if it isn't to him, something else needed to change. He snickered and told me I was crazy for thinking it wasn't worth it to him, any time together is worth it. He makes me

2011-01-23T19:37:00.001-05:00

I sometimes forget that occasionally one needs a break from the routine to just sit back and reflect on everything. Sometimes those moments of reflection is the best thing for a weary soul.

2010-08-02T00:48:00.001-05:00

Tomorrow is another day. I will wake up and there it will be, with all its promise and all its glory and potential to be the best day of the rest of my life...

2009-10-07T20:40:00.003-05:00

~ That's not the way I want my story to end ~~ Perfection is the protection that I never have attainedthe slice of silence in the cloud broke the silver lining The protection of perfection must be obtainedthe silver lining must hold till the silence subsides.==========================================Where did it go ?That which once washow could it have gone away so quicklywithout warningwithout

2009-07-07T17:23:00.002-05:00

So, sometimes television gets it right. Maybe not the answers, but at least the right questions. Like what would people do if one day I just didn't wake up (unexpectedly). The unexpected is so much more terrifying than the expected. Shall I always be gyvedto the fear?Is there nothing more

2009-06-23T20:56:00.002-05:00

.....She sits in the corner, hunched over in tears. She doesn't realizethat He has removed all her fears. She doesn't realize it nowbut she has been blessedwhere she sees a closed dooris an opened window crest She doesn't see the sun through the dark cloudsbut when the pain is done away will go the shroudsIn the dark corner she criesunaware that He protects herfrom her own liesWhen she

2009-06-12T20:12:00.003-05:00

Do you remember when he said this line? "This is the American Dream"Sometimes I agree. Sometimes I see where he was coming from. He found humor in the true nature of mankind, the true nature of what we "wanted" vs. what we truly honestly, deep down wanted and needed. There was a dark humor from where he stood, because he saw mankind as it was in its nitty gritty natural state. Chaos. So

2009-04-19T17:26:00.002-05:00

It seems that this past week I was stuck behind the eight ball. It was not fun, not fun at all. I was out of town (yeah I know what else is new) the week before and then went to work the following week. Yeah, it was not so fun last week. The week consisted of : Fixing many many broken things, getting a speeding ticket (not the cop's fault, hes just doing his job I was the one speeding), so

2009-03-22T19:13:00.003-05:00

My bucket list.Tandum Skydiving (check)Non-tandum skydivingSwiming with the sharksSwimming with the colored fishes before the coral reefs are goneBallon ride (check)Ballon ride with my loveDeep Sea fishingBungee JumpRun a marathon (yeah I know subject myself to the pain)Fly a plane (check)Be in a playSing in front of people (non-kayoke)I am sure there is more. I cannot think of it.

2008-12-29T18:14:00.002-05:00

This is the Calvin and Hobbes no one saw. Partly because, I am sure, it is not the end the author truly intended, but an ending that the pessimistic people of the world saw and re-drew. There was one that didn't mention medication at all, but spoke of focus and responsibility. When he was talking to Hobbes and asking him a question and Hobbes didn't answer he asked why, looked over and then

2008-11-23T18:43:00.003-05:00

Something sent to me by my beloved brother. “There is no sudden leap to greatness.Your success lies in doing day by day.Your upward reach will come from working well and carefully. Good work done little by little becomes great work.The house of success is built brick by brick. Adopt the pace of nature. The secret is patience.A bottle fills drop by drop.”So is it true...I have a tendancy to think

2008-11-19T21:00:00.001-05:00

So love life..do I?

2008-07-27T20:53:00.003-05:00

So here I am. Where one end up when they are lost. Perhaps a lonely road, perhaps a crossroads, its hard to tell when the night is so dark and the mist is so thick. All I know is that right now, I do feel alone. I feel like I am struggling to keep my head above water, I am floating for now. I have to find floaties or I may sink.

2008-07-14T17:44:00.003-05:00

Ah yes. Another class. I leave tomorrow. I will be one of the most educated dumb people I know. This one is a bit longer, but closer to home so I will be able to come home every weekend if I so choose to spend the ungodly amount of money on gas. We as a society need to work on this teleport device. You know the one that allows people to move from place to place very quickly without having

2008-06-24T19:16:00.004-05:00

This image reminds me a lot about life. I don't know the guy who made it but its called Kiwi and I am sure if you search for it on YouTube you will find it. It makes me sad and happy at the same time. Makes me think of life in a very real way. The little Kiwi goes through such lengths to be like those who can fly. Does all he can, and goes gracefully into his end. Life is no less interesting

2008-06-23T18:07:00.002-05:00

Back home now. Its nice to be back home, although I wish it were more put together than it is. I know, I know, thats what I get for leaving for six weeks. Anywho. No things have not really gotten better, there is still tension, but what can you do. Its the 700 pound gorilla in the room, I have identified that it is in the room, but R refuses to see or acknowledge it.

2008-05-13T20:42:00.002-05:00

Ah yes. Learning. Its a never ending process that continues to hinder and enrich me. Yes I know it seems odd that it would do both things, but it is what it is. You live, you learn, you get off your tuccus and apply yourself. I think that I love learning and yet hate it with a passion. There is so much that is doctinally true, but is not put into pratice for various reasons. Anywho. I love

2008-05-03T17:41:00.001-05:00

This was too funny not to post. Courtesy of www.afblues.com

2007-12-24T09:58:00.000-05:00

So I have had about a week off of work for R&R. ITs been very nice. Sometimes I wonder why I am where I am in my life and am not happy with my shortcomings and the shortcomings of my loved ones. Then I realize for all the shortcomings, the little things that make me happy make it more than worth it. For example; the one I love makes coffee for me before I get out of bed, we snuggle and do

2007-11-24T21:00:00.000-05:00

Thoughts and things to ponder....When we ask another if there is a God, is that not a confirmation of a higher power?How is it that the term applies to either one or many, depending on what part of the world and what side of the circle you and your kind hail from. The God's name and or names vary depending on the side of the realm. We know very little of how when where and why, but there are many

2007-11-18T20:42:00.000-05:00

Its been awhile again hasn't it?Well this is where I am in life;I have finished my MSSI and will be working on another degree here in awhile once I figure out what I want to do with my life once I grow up. Russell and I are doing fine with our seven chinchillas. We will be having a friend or 2 over for Turkey day, hopefully it will be fun times to be had mostly by us. When are you coming to

2007-07-16T20:23:00.000-05:00

The lone succubus.... The delicate balance of good and evil can be observed on a cool summer night. While walking in the woods one can listen for the sensuous song of the lone succubus. She wades in the center of the lake playing her violin,luring the unknowing woodsmen to the center of the woods to be lost amongst the trees. The music wisps through the air carried by the wind, far beyond

2007-06-30T13:41:00.000-05:00

Who would have thought that the words of a Dave Matthews band song would go through my head just as they happen in real life. The song "Crash" by DMB is one of my favorites, however, since I was crashed into last night in my car while the song was tooling in my head, I might re-evaluate that. I will post the pictures of the vehicle after I get them developed. I hurt a little bit, I will go to

2007-06-23T21:13:00.000-05:00

Before science explained to man the little we know about the world, there were fables, myths and stories that mummy's and daddies told their children to explain the world in which they lived. In some parts of the world a giant tortoise holds the world on its back, in others rain was brought by a bird who flew overhead. The Gods and Goddesses were in control of nature, when there was an imbalance

2007-06-13T17:40:00.000-05:00

Woe is me. My life is not at an end, but it is in a shabble. I did not get my promotion. Such is life. I would feel better if a mentor of mine had not told me this last time I got promoted "If you don't feel like you deserved this promotion, prove that you did by blowing your next promotion out of the water." It sucks, so now I feel like I don't deserve the position I have now. So other

2007-04-22T12:33:00.000-05:00

====================== Curtain rises and her heart beats, she glances into the blinding light. Flowing like flames from her feet, the fabric of her dress flows around her her wings unfold. Silence draws a line between the reality and the fantasy of the ballet She is unaware of those in the room with her, she is unaware of those in the room with her.================== Short answer, no. Ten years

2006-10-14T20:32:00.000-05:00

So this has been a running blog for some time. I haven't posted it yet because I didn't feel like there was enough posted. Its ready now though, well after this one it will be. CR was great this time around. It was beautiful, this little guy is a Coati. Hes like a raccoon in the tropics of Costa Rica. This one we found on the side of the road near Arenal, where there is an active volcano. We

2006-09-30T20:23:00.000-05:00

More randomness that is me...." Afraid if we dance we might die"So another conversation with my controversial friend. I love him to death but his ideals and thoughts might be the death of me. He doesn't agree with my career path, but that's his problem, not mine. I am proud of what I do damnit, I make a difference, or at least, sometimes I feel like I do.We will see how much of a difference I

2006-09-24T19:26:00.000-05:00

People are an intresting breed. Really, they are, if you think about it. What other species has the variants we do? How many other species have the prejudices, the thought patterns and the humanity really that we can have? Is there one?How many other species really have a thing like malice, hate and contempt?Here is a thought, what is a fact? Describe it to me, what is history, other than a

2006-09-22T22:09:00.000-05:00

Hello world...its me. Lonely little me.Since there seems to be nothing going on in my life for the next few weeks minus an ungodly amount of studying and writting papers and stuff alongs those lines, I will sit here and write for a few minutes. And then maybe go to sleep. I want to go get some pizza. mmm pizza

2006-08-21T23:06:00.000-05:00

The plea of a young child who loves her mother is always a heart breaking one.My little sister is currently the only one left at home, and she is a wonderful little girl who loves her mother a great deal.She called me fairly late tonight to inform me that my mother has this "notion" in her head that her children favor their father over her. If its true or not I cannot say, but i will say this, my

2006-08-19T20:01:00.000-05:00

Yeah I know, its been awhile. So what are you going to do .....sue me?Anyhow, Its been an intresting month here in the land of the three states. I haven't completely unpacked or organized the house, I haven't worked out everyday like I wanted to, but i have depleted or at least lessened my wine collection and the amount of bailys in my irish cream bottle. Such is my life, no I am not a lush, well

2006-07-23T19:38:00.000-05:00

What sort of world leader would you be? You would make a great PRESIDENT. You like the idea of having the population controlling its government. You feel you are here to serve the people and have their best interests and the country's at heart. However, corruption is rife - and so is discontent. You are getting sick and fed up of protesters rallying around you - pelting you with eggs. You have

2006-07-22T23:34:00.000-05:00

Beautiful aren't they? The Northern Lights, a fine sight that I have yet to go see. There are many things in this world that I have yet to see, this is one of them. The thought of missing these makes me sad, if the northern lights isn't in the 1000 places to see before you die it really should be. Maybe one day after I'm done moving around the world like a random chicken with her head cut off,

2006-06-02T17:56:00.000-05:00

Once again with the random ramblings... from meThere are things never said to others that need to hear them....like I love you...I miss you...orI am sorry.There are things that are said that should be forgiven...like I hate youI despise youI never wanted youThere are things that have been done that I cannot faceI still fear them.....I still fear them....===========================================

2006-05-13T18:39:00.000-05:00

All done with the GRE. I need to finish my essay and my classes that I'm working on now, but other than that I'm done.You are Bettie PageGirl next door with a wild streakYou're a famous beauty - with unique lookAnd the people like you are cultish about itWhat Famous Pinup Are You?

2006-05-08T19:26:00.000-05:00

I am afraid, very afraid. The only shred of hope that I have is that the admin office has already accepted me and I am good to go for the MSSI program. I took my GRE today and was not to happy with the results, but that's life right? So be it. dad has a tendency to put it all into perspective for me with 2 questions; 1) Are you being shot at?2) Are you hearing shelling in the background and/or

2006-04-28T14:35:00.000-05:00

I would like you all to meet fluffy....fear him...but hes sooo CUTE!Such a long time, no typey.... So here I am in the place where people escape to forget their troubles and worries and spend some time in the surf and the sun. Am I here alone, it seems like it sometimes, it is not really just because I'm here on work, its also because I am here almost against my will. I have enjoyed it though. I

2006-03-26T18:36:00.000-05:00

Its the begining of spring. I look out my window and see purple scattered throughout the field before me. There are birds flying through the sky, although it is still bloody cold outside. I am listening to the Memoires of a Geshia. So far its good. So far....a bit long. I have to run to wally world I need some stuff. My beautiful little Pushka. She is such a little spooty head. Ok got to go.Me.

2006-03-19T18:08:00.000-05:00

>Sigh< I am tired. I finished the front today, its done, well at least my half of the yard is. I had a very productful weekend, even though I did no work work. I did only house stuff, nothing that was assosiated with work. I'm glad I'm leaving here soon, this veiw of a vacant field will be lost in a few months. They are building so quick around here its silly....everyone wants to live outside

2006-03-11T11:15:00.000-05:00

I'm soooooo hungry!!!! I walked 3 miles this morning, yes damnit I am proud of that. I think that it was a very productive and healthy walk...Team Fluffy Monkey's GO! The heart walk of all things, now I'm waiting to go get some extreemly unhealthy Mexican Food. Mmmmmmm foooood. So I can finally talk to my husband on the phone on a normal basis now. I hope everything is alright with him. It seemed

2006-03-05T20:20:00.000-05:00

So I broke down and got a myspace account....I know...so lame... but thats ok, alot of my friends have one and its alot easier i guess. I miss them sometimes, and then sometimes I'm glad that there is only one or two people who know me who might still read this thing. Its cool.....I like it that way. The other people who read this are random and few and far beteen I think. Who would do a search

2006-02-26T19:26:00.000-05:00

There is so much if my life that remains a vague mystery to those who love me, and to those I love. That ok...If someone was an open book what would be the fun...There would be too much predictability. Sometimes I wonder if there is something else I should be doing with my life. I could have been something else. I could be in the middle of nowhere, barefoot and pregnant, but that's not really me

2006-01-22T11:36:00.000-05:00

"Happiness is celebrating the little things" Sadness that I don't feel like talking about right now.So there is some to report. I have made it into a somewhat elite school that I have wanted to go to since I first heard of it. I found out on Tuesday that I made it in and I would start this summer. =) Its Sunday morning, I should be cleaning the house, but I'm not going to. I'm going to six back

2005-12-12T18:58:00.000-05:00

So I'm slightly annoyed, but once again I am at bay with my thoughts. Just because people are wrong doesn't mean I have to agree with them; oh wait I mean just because people have different (although be it very wrong) opinons about politics and such doesn't mean I have to in a bad mood for the rest of the day. People and their thoughts, thats what I'm doing though right? Thats what me, my husband

2005-12-04T17:50:00.000-05:00

Hello world. There isn't much to say other than the world is falling piece by piece. It seems that everyone has problems. Including myself, but that is life isn't it? This game that we play called life is weighing heavily on my head. A friend of mine is having troubles right now. Hes having troubles with all of life because hes not sure what he wants to do with his life, he doesn't know the kind

2005-10-30T10:55:00.000-05:00

There is something lingering in the back of my mind that should not be there that should not exist in the mind that is mine. It is there none the less so I will just deal with it like I always do. I miss my husband, the bed is cold, the fact that there is little to no intlligent conversation with the people I work with the fact that I miss him a great deal and I know that htere is a light at the

2005-10-16T20:12:00.000-05:00

"All they gave me was this ticket to heaven, and said lie in the bed that you made"Perhaps this won't show up like I want it to bue oh well, no one else reads my blogs any more anyhow. I'm killing myself with work recently, 2xupderdivision courses and one POL course this term, oh yeah and that little thing that takes up about 12 hours of the day called work. Hm...Its ok, I'll be gone again soon!

2005-10-02T19:20:00.000-05:00

Theres nothing more depressing than depressed company.... so I deal with it and I try to stay out of her way so she doesn't bite my head off too. Such is life. This year is going to be a long one regardless of any type of training or trips that may take me away....there is no reason for me to be sad about anything other than my love being so far away and so far away and so far away. This is my

2005-08-30T09:58:00.000-05:00

"I fear the worst in you....Don't say that you don't , ... and if you could see me now..."So here I am, alone till tomorrow, till tomorrow they say. Somewhat sureal being here alone. I should be doing as much homework or cleanining as I can possibly do, but instead I slept and watched TV for most of the day. I did clean though, and I did read some of my homework, I figure I am not going to sleep

2005-08-13T19:04:00.000-05:00

"I tear my self open, I sew myself shut, but my weakness is that I care too much, and the scars remind me that the past is real, I tear my heart open just to feel, "Sometimes there is no where else to go but down, and no where or one to be there with you when you are there. Why is over 50 percent of the world so self destructive? Why is it that they consistantly maintain this two steps forward

2005-07-17T19:18:00.000-05:00

It's not even winter yet, normally its Christmas that makes me feel this way... of course, when I am like this I am at my worse....yet my most creative.... I want a piano, I want to teach myself how to make the beautiful and sorrowful music that can go along with lyrics from times before. I will finish this cup and start on the water. Its almost never this bad, it hasn't been this bad in years...

2005-06-28T19:54:00.000-05:00

One of the greater things in life isn't free, since everything comes with a price, although it may not be monetary, it still exists as a price. It has been so long since I last blogged, not because of lack of want, but because of lack of time or resources. There are some places that I travel that I cannot access blog.....such is life, such is my life that is.Since it has been so long, I have some

2005-01-01T06:15:00.000-05:00

"Time is a valuable thing, watch it slip by as the pendulum swings...I tried so hard and got so far, but in the end it doesn't even matter...." Welcome to 2005 ladies and gentle-folk..... First day of the new year, and I must say, it was a doosey...... My heart still breaks a little more each time I leave. I know it is a necessary evil, it is how we chose to live our lives and that the ends

2004-12-29T00:55:00.000-05:00

Long time no typey.....I know. My life has been as it always is, spastic. So what else is there to expect from one who has nothing and yet everything to do all at once, living for the yesterday, the now and the tomorrow all at the same time. What else is there to gain, but nothing, everything....and all in between. So I love, and I love with all my heart and it feels good, even in this cold

2004-11-12T23:53:00.000-05:00

Wouldn't that be something? So is it the world that I miss, My old world? Do I really miss that life? Sometimes I wonder and then think, no...Not so much with the missing of that life. I have something, I would trade it all away for, wouldn't I? Random as I am I can admit that I do miss the beach and the times I had there. Never look back, only look forward........ So my life is to soon no

2004-11-10T20:57:00.000-05:00

"Maybe different but remember, winter is warm there you and I" Choices: SO a dilema had presented itself and then faded like the sun fades into the sea, but I am sure this dilema will present itself again. There is nothing in this world quite like stress, it feeds me it drives me, it makes me get up in the morning and realize that my eye is twitching. Dark humor, its something some of us come

2004-10-31T19:44:00.000-05:00

I am listening to the Panel that delt with the 911 issues. It's about an 1 45+ long. Very intresting it is. It makes me think about what was done prior to 911 and why we could have known. Is there a way it could have been prevented? This is one of the issues that would be in the "What If " Book I've read. There is still alot going on that we don't understand, we are still trying to figure them

2004-10-12T18:24:00.000-05:00

Hello World, How goes life in everyones niche' of the woods? " I wanted you to know that I love the way you left, ... I know it serves me well, I wanna hold you, I am still you pain, cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome, and I don't feel right when youv'e gone away. " Yes this is my world right now, and I've noticed that there is comfort down at the bottom of the bottles for me sometimes,

2004-10-05T16:51:00.000-05:00

First day back was today... almost good to be back at work. Almost............. It was a PT day, so I got to so some running, and now these old bones hurt like they haven't hurt in a long time. Thats because I'm a fatty though. =P I feel like there is somethign I have been forgetting to do, I know there is something I need to do or say but it seems to always slip my mind. MY

2004-09-21T23:49:00.000-05:00

So the saga that never ends that is my life. Hm, I suppose that it will end one day, they all do don't they? What about those who's stories surpass them? Even in death their stories live on, to teach us to guide us and to redeem or remind us in some way shape or form. For where are we without history, but at the beginning once again to make the mistakes so foolishly made by others. Will we

2004-09-19T19:48:00.000-05:00

Hello all, This is the first blog in a long time. I wish I could tell you why, but then I'd have to kill you ....just kidding. =) But its another day another twenty five cents, I don't think this is working, I don't think this is going to work for me, I think I need some wine. I haven' t had any wine yet. Why did I start writing tonight? Hm oh yes, the lost feeling I have inside. I

2004-06-27T20:11:00.000-05:00

God must be very angry, or sad. There isn't much to day today other than the weather has been very bad. It was great earlier, but then it turned for the worse really quick. Thunder, lightning and a downpour of rain plauge the cities of SC tonight. There is nothing more frightening on the road than wondering if yuo can make it home safe. There is nothing out there to fear, but Gods wrath . . .

2004-06-20T19:49:00.000-05:00

Life is a funny thing isn't it? Not funny ha ha like a comedy show... but funny. Funny like how you feel when your toes curl up and go numb, funny like how you feel when you know that someone somewhere is thinking of you. Funny like when the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end, or when you know deep down inside that something is

2004-06-06T19:25:00.000-05:00

A few simple lyrics can make or break a day for me sometimes. I find it sad and redeeming at the same time. There are those songs that make you so happy just because they take you back to a time where you remember something a little more than happy. Some take you to a time that makes you remember something a little more than sad, those can make me cry at times. Sometimes, and sometimes they just

2004-05-30T22:13:00.000-05:00

There are some things in the world that you expect from friends, or at least hope for in a friend. Support is one of those things, isn't it? Or shouldn't it be? Perhaps that was too much for me to ask of a long time friend of mine. Evidently my chosen career isn't up to par with what it could/should be. So he belittles me for it, he brings it up every-so-often and it annoys me. I wish he could

2004-05-18T23:43:00.000-05:00

So questions arise every day, when each life is stolen from the light, and things fall to the limelight. Is there something out there for me? This thing called heaven does it exist? Do I care? There is a place I call heaven, but I have yet to know it. I only dream of it, I only hope for it. So be it. As it was and always will be.

2004-05-16T23:37:00.000-05:00

Hello world, its me again. I'm in Vegas again, another day, another .25 cents. Theres another reason I supose for me to write this blog, its theraputic, and I haven't done it in awhile. I miss this, I wish I could blog every day, but life doesn't work that way, I don't have that much spare time. I wish I did, but I don't. So I just got back from vacation, it was nice. I met my hubby's family

2004-04-06T21:01:00.000-05:00

So its been forever and a day since I posted one of these. Perhaps its because my computer access has been diminished to nearly none. I don't know, I was asked if this was therapeutic, and I told the askee that it was, because it is. I am in the safe desert right now, Vegas baby, Vegas, yeah. Great that I get to be the DD for them all, all the alkiholics, I get to be this nice little person and

2004-02-28T23:31:00.000-05:00

So it was a beautiful day today here in the South. From what I understand it ws a beautiful day in both coasts. I hope everything back home is going grand, I will drive back tomorrow, possibly stoping for a bit of religious refeshener. Everything here is as good as to be expected. I wish I were back overseas though. PErhaps I feel like a forginer here because I was gone so long. two years is a

2004-02-18T11:45:00.000-05:00

Yes I know long tempo no write~o....its a transitioning period I suppose. So much has happened in so little time I have no idea where to start. First off, my boo and I will be going to meet the families soon. There we will finally cross the gauntlet as they say and endure the others family. I am sure his isn't as bad as mine is. Or at least, I couldn't possibly dream how they could be. Then

2003-12-15T19:10:00.000-05:00

Greetings from Brazil. Its very nice here. Very green. I hope we get a place here, even if it is a small one. This is such a nice hotel, and this is a funny movie. Anyhow will blog more in the future, but not right now. TTFN D

2003-12-04T07:27:00.000-05:00

so its one of my last nights in Korea and I'mhanginf out w/ a good friend and watching CSI. Its fun and I'm now official, I will be married in 2006.

2003-11-01T06:22:00.000-05:00

Yes, it has happened to me again. Its been one of those days. I was very tacktfully told today that I was to be removed from my position of putting together the Thanksgiving get together for the office. Thats alright, they can have someone else do it this year, I have other things to worry about, like getting ready to get out of here. I got caught with the little fluffy one by my first shirt the

2003-10-27T07:18:00.000-05:00

Perhaps there is something to this whole thing I'm just not grasping. Perhaps there is something that I can't understand only because I have never known things of such nature. Then again, here I am at the ripe old age that I am at, and I wonder, I wonder if I went the wrong way somewhere. It was once said it is not the big choices you make in your life that really effect you, like which college,

2003-10-22T08:06:00.000-05:00

Hello world, how goes all? I am doing fine here in the land of no~where. These old movies, I love them, there is something about older movies that I just cant find in the new Hollywood. There is something about them, somethign that isn't in movies anymore. It was a very different tiem back then. Sometimes I wonder if there is such a thing as reincarnation. I've been told many times that I have an

2003-10-18T07:57:00.000-05:00

....Spoiling oneself to a day of treats is one of the most enjoyable things in the world, ...pity I haven't had the time to do something like that in a long time. Right now I am relaxing...if there were such a thing in this place. So my boyfriend is coming to visit me, either here or at home, it looks like it will be here though. Its a good thing. I miss him dearly. . . very dearly. I should

2003-10-13T10:00:00.000-05:00

For some reason, today wasn't my day. Not that anything BAD really happened, I think I just had several epiphany that I didn't enjoy to much. Ones about MSP, and my life. I had some of the best sleep that I had ever had last night, but it took me forever to fall asleep. Sometimes I wonder why my occasional insomnia returns and fades only to return again. I would say oh woe is my life, however, I

2003-10-10T11:51:00.000-05:00

I went out tonight, first time in a long time that I went out to "party", which of course, was not my intention this time. I went to a Hail and Farewell, then got "dragged"along for Kerouac. It was fun, after all that we went out to the clubs till curfew. I have a headache now, got knocked down by some guys who were fighting and hit my head. It hurt. Anyhow, while downtown I saw a friend of

2003-10-03T05:50:00.000-05:00

Please forgive me for complaining, however, its been one of those years. I'm here in my room watching one of those old movies, a black and white Humphrey Bogart movie. The harder they fall. I think I might like this movie. I don't know why, but I always like old movies. ~"Money's money no matter where you get it..."~ HB

2003-09-27T10:26:00.000-05:00

You know I was about to write a friend of mine an email, but then I realized, that she wouldn't have the slightest clue what I was talking about, and if I went into depth and explained myself to her, then I'd be writing forever. So I figured I'd write it all here, since I owe no explanation to anyone in this blog. I can ramble on and on about nothing at all and make no sense and not have to

2003-09-25T09:24:00.000-05:00

"So it's been one of those days has it, well then sit back and enjoy the show...." I went to bed this morning around zero dark, or early morning light, whichever you prefer, and then I get this call, nice and early, shortly after I had fallen asleep. " Yeah we need you to come into work in uniform and blah blah blah.....at 1400" That gave me a little but more time to sleep, but

2003-09-15T10:27:00.000-05:00

Everyone leaves me tomorrow, not everyone, but many of the ones I knew. Perhaps it is for the best. I cannot believe I have less than ninety days left here in the ROK. Thats great, I'll be leaving here to go suck sand through a gas mask....joy...

2003-08-20T08:14:00.000-05:00

For the saddest words in tounge or pen are those "What might have been..."

2003-08-16T11:01:00.000-05:00

Those of us plauged by a disease that causes us to be up at all hours of the night and day tend to live shorter lives. REsearch proves it, people who have insomnia, the disorder which causes a lack or sleep, normaly live shorter lives than the person who sleeps a normal 7-9 hours a night. Sometimes I wonder if the reason I can't sleep is because I'm plauged by thoughts that disturb me. Thinking

2003-08-13T10:07:00.000-05:00

SO I actually stayed sober tonight. No beer, no vodka, no Rum...nothing. Quite proud of me, nice way to start out my remainder of my time here. I've decided to SERIOULY cut back on my drinking.....to the almost non-drinking. Maybe a few here or there, but no more of this 5-15 beers or drinks a night, screw that crapola...... I'll write more later, but right now.....I'm going to go do something

2003-08-11T10:55:00.000-05:00

I sit here and drink this Miller Lite when I really want is a bud lite. I feel bad, I think I blinded someone. I hit his beer (for the fuzz effect) and I think the glass that broke off went into his eye. I think the worse thing in the world is; well, perhaps how I treat people. Am I bad person? DJ keeps telling me that I owe none of them anything and to stop acting like I do. Basically she said

2003-08-08T14:11:00.000-05:00

So this is how it crumbles...the cookie I mean. Yes I guess so, life, and endless vicious circle of something....and yet nothing at all.The only thing that has meaning to me I treat so badly I don't deserve it. I miss him, I love him and I hope he forgives me for my sins.

2003-08-07T10:30:00.000-05:00

Perhaps life is a bit more complicated than we think it to be, perhaps we think that life in itself should have a meaning. Wouldn't it be the biggest kick in the ass to the world over if there was nothing to "live" for other than to just live? I think so. Yes of course people say that without love there is no life. I

2003-08-07T10:28:00.000-05:00

For every sin, a pentance, for every pentance, a grieveance or hardship, and for every hardship there is a sin. It is a vicous cycle that we endure to survive in todays world. There is nothing more violent than the cycle of sin. We live in an eye for an eye world, and yet expect mercy at every door we knock on. We ask for forgivness and yet give none. There is nothing that we can forgive others

2003-08-04T07:58:00.000-05:00

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....excuse me...I'm fat. I feel so fat right now, I just got back from the steakhouse, yes, that will make you feel nice and fluffy. Very good steak, well, good for Korea. I want to clean my room but ...I'm lazy. Tehehehe. I got a phone call from a friend this morning and he had to go on emergency leave. His abuela died. I thought I was dreaming, but half way

2003-08-01T10:39:00.000-05:00

You smile and nod and act like its all alright after you find out who it was that stabbed you in the back with that ten inch knife. I mean what else can you do? A person (or people) you trusted at one point or another, decide to screw you over, and you just sit there and smile and nod after it's all over with because your just not the type to reach around, take the knife out of your own back

2003-07-28T12:36:00.000-05:00

"Gone with the wind", one of the greatest movies ever made. One of those movies about overcoming the loss of a loved one, in one way or another. Scarlett losses him to another woman, a woman who she makes her "friend". She goes through much, but then again, some of it she brings on herself. Or does she? One part of the movie which I adore is when Scarlett goes out of the hospital because she

2003-07-27T13:21:00.000-05:00

Is there anything in life that is certain? Yes, death and Taxes, and although both can be avoided for awhile they will both eventually catch up to you and possibly make you pay some type of penalty...like a late fee. There is nothing more certain than those two things, certainly not love, for love is as fickle as the public opinion, it sways like the weeping willow in the wind. Perhaps it is

2003-07-22T16:51:00.000-05:00

So I was thinking about something quite oddly enough today as I was sitting on a bus in MOPP four with two of my other co-workers...does all this training help at all. Would I really be ready, if need be, to do what was needed of me in a time of need. A repetitive statement I know, but I'm tired, 12's takes it out of me like that. I like to think I will and would when called upon, do my best and

2003-07-22T05:20:00.000-05:00

Im so glad that I get to go into work late today, if I had to go in at 1800 I think I would have died. Especially since bunnie boy called to wake me in teh middle of my sleep. Punkfolio. I'm also glad that I'm not afraid of spiders, cause there is a huge one living right outside my window. Its about the size of a Half-Dollar. Its a brown one, don't know the kind, I just know I'm not opening my

2003-07-21T17:15:00.000-05:00

For all the things I hate in this world, one of them is the inability to crack my neck or back in one small spot. By the end of this week my back is going to hurt so much I could cry. Stupid 60 extra lbs of gear and rain and humidity and icky icky heat. Stupid training. I see the meaning, and I know that there is method to the madness, but it doesn't help that it still sucks. SO I go off to

2003-07-19T01:28:00.000-05:00

There are many things that bring joy to peoples lives, sometimes its the smallest things in the world, and we don't know it. The problem lies where too many of those small things get taken away. Little by little they get taken away and your not quite sure why, but you wake up one day and realize that your not quite as happy as you were the week or day before. When you wake up missing something,

2003-07-14T09:31:00.000-05:00

Its been one of those weeks. Just turning 20 can be a painful thing...especially when the drinking age in this country is 20.....and that seems to be every GI's pastime, drinking....at least here. I have so many bruises, and I don't know where half of them came from. Oh flippin well. Korea, the land of the morning calm....and soju. I found out some intrestingly painful news tonight, seems as